Stress-ball War II

Remember the cow-tossing war I mentioned we had at Patty's b-day party a few weeks ago?

Well, as I mentioned in the last post, part 2 happened this past Memorial day, after Ariana & Marisa's graduation party. We went back to Joe & Patty's place and Joe had restocked his stress toy collection so the war began again!

Luckily, this time Henry was around and he had a video camera. So enjoy the craziness (mind you the original time was much more spontaneous and crazy, but this is a very good indicator of the insanity). This is the first part of the evening:



Then check out this compilation Henry made of the entire event- quite amusing.

One thing I forgot to mention

There was one last bit of good news I forgot to share in my last post.

Ariana & I had our interview with the co-op board the other week, and we got our response- we were accepted!!

So now all we have to do is officially close on the apartment and it's ours. It's taking a little time b/c the seller's lawyer is an idiot, but whatever, as long as we get it soon, it'll be good. So I'm hoping we'll close at some point in the next week (or 2 weeks at the longest) so we can start working on the place so I can move in by early August. It's pretty exciting- I'm really looking forward to it.

Catching up on some stuff

Things have been really busy lately (as you've read from my previous posts). So I haven't been able to update on all the stuff that's happened lately.

Some big things that have happened in the last week (outside of stuff with my dad).

First off, me & Ariana attended the "Opening Night gala" of Pete's boat- Serenissima last Tuesday. Pete hosts parties on his boat at least once a week in the summertime every year, but we usually are never able to go (for various reasons). But we wanted to be sure to make it this time, and I'm glad we did. Pete ordered food from Lido Restaurant (and got quite a nice spread) and we all had plenty to eat (and it was excellent).

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Another major event that occured last week was that last Saturday was Ariana's graduation from Graduate School from Fordham University.

We were praying for good weather b/c everytime either of us has graduated, it's been really bad weather (mostly pouring rain). Thankfully, Ariana finally broke the streak (for the most part)! It drizzled a little bit during the commencement, but it wasn't bad. So they were able to have that part of the ceremony outdoors. Willie Randolph was the commencement speaker and he was pretty entertaining (even despite the jokes on the Yankees he made).

They decided to move the diploma ceremony portion indoors to Fordham Prep, which worked out better, b/c it was getting kind of cool out, so we were happy about that. I got some great pics, and I'm sure Ariana will post some of them on her myspace soon.

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Later that evening, we went with my family, as well as James to see Shrek the Third at New Roc City. It was a fun movie, not as good as the original two, but amusing. It was also more adult than the previous movies, as there were times when some jokes had me and James cracking up in the back of the theater while all the kids in the audience (which was about 80% of the crowd) sat in silence.

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The next day I took my family for a semi-belated Mother's Day dinner. I say "semi-belated" b/c obviously I offered to take everyone out for dinner ON Mother's day, but they wanted to wait a week, b/c they knew most restaurants would be extremely crowded.

So I treated my mom, her husband, my grandparents, Ariana and her godmother- Rosie to dinner at Lido Restaurant in City Island. The food was great as always (cuz as I mentioned we had some at Pete's boat just earlier in the week).

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We went to the Yankees-Red Sox game on Tuesday night. Figures the game we went to is the one the Yanks lost (they won the other 2 in the series). Oh well...

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And just today, we had Marisa & Ariana's graduation party. Originally we were going to have a BBQ at Marisa's backyard, but the weather forecast made it seem like we would be facing thunderstorms. So on Friday, Marisa's mom decided that she wouldn't want us scrambling to cancel the BBQ the day of, if it poured, so to avoid that, she made the very generous offer to book the side room at the East Tremont Chinese Buffet for us. Marisa's parents also offered to pay for the first 20 of us who arrived. Which was very nice.

In the end, the weather turned out to be perfect, which we were a little upset about (cuz it just figures, lol), but as I stated, things were better the way they worked out b/c it gave us all peace of mind for the day.

We all wound up having a great time at the Buffet. They really had some great food today, that I don't recall seeing them have before (like Roast beef, lamb, crab legs, etc). Plus, we just had a great crowd as always.

After the food, Joe & Patty were kind enough to offer to host us at their place for some drinking and games. Joe had reloaded on his cows, and added a few other squishy toys to his arsenal, so when we got to their place we had Cow-War II. It wasn't as insane as the original (I guess b/c there was more people so harder to get around, plus it wasn't as spontaneous as the first time), but it was still a blast. And it once again went on for about a half hour, lol.

Once we got the cow-tossing out of our systems, we settled down a bit. Ariana & I sat down with Patty and we went over the designs for the Save the Date cards for the wedding we need to send out soon. Then after that, we played a few rounds of Scattergories.

So it has been a really fun day. Right now I'm just chillin, watching Raw in the background as I type. This coming weekend is Jubilee at Fordham so I'm looking really forward to that, so keep checking in for posts (and pics I'm sure) about that event.

Updated WeddingMania Poster!

The version I posted in the last blog wasn't the finished product (thus the reason that Ariana's name wasn't in the pic, nor was there a ladder in the background). But I was just so excited by what Chaz had done so far that I had to share it.

But here is the finalized version of our WeddingMania promo poster! Check out more details on the "event" in the near future!

God is GOOD!!!

Today, we got some of the best news in awhile- my dad has gotten MUCH more responsive.

Today he actually SPOKE!

It was amazing! He had been trying to for awhile but he was finally able to manage it today. I was asking him questions and I saw his mouth moving and I heard some gargled words coming out. So I kept asking him to repeat himself and he kept trying but I couldn't understand him at first. But then the lightbulb went off in my head and I realzed I would need to cover the trache tube hole in order to hear/understand him better. And once I did that, Ariana and I were able to understand him! It was still hard, b/c it was coming out very low, but it was fairly clear!

We asked him questions and he answered and he asked questions himself. At first he just repeated "therapy, therapy, therapy." Then asked if "both speech therapy and physical were together." We told him about getting guardianship, but now that he was responsive we could do the Power of Attorney instead. So I began to read the document to him, and he asked a few questions. At one point we told him that we would need access to his bank account so we could pay his bills, but that we would need to get direct deposit for his paychecks since he is old school and would always like to get the check in his hand. So he responded "direct deposit.. much easier."

Then a little while later, his friend/co-worker Pat Smith came by, and when he saw her he said "Patti!" So he definitely recognizes and understands everything that is going on! It is truly a miracle from God!

Granted, it's a huge strain for him to talk, and he can't answer everything verbally- he IS trying, and if he can't answer by speaking, he will shake his head or nod to most questions. So it is great!

I've had the biggest grin on my face since this afternoon and I couldn't wait to share the good news with everyone. So please, continue to pray for Eddie's recovery, b/c obviously all of our prayers are working! And also, praise God for what he has done so far b/c he is GOOD!!

It's coming...

Stay Tuned...

The Hunt...

So I spent pretty much all day yesterday running around the Bronx like a madman. I had to visit four different nursing/rehab facilities in order to choose which one I would want to send my father to.

I spent about 45 minutes to an hour at each place, asking questions and taking tours. I also had to swing by Montefiore to have a meeting with a social worker to get more details about his health insurance, trying to find out exactly what it would and wouldn't cover (and I have to admit, I'm still a little confused on that end, but I'll deal with that shortly).

The four facilities that I went to were Daughters of Jacob, Jewish Home & Hospital, Beth Abraham, and Morningside House.

My top choice was Morningside House (which is on Pelham Parkway between White Plains Rd & Williamsbridge Rd). It is an excellent facility. It's in a nice neighborhood, the building is well kept, and the facility really stresses rehab (which is what we really want for my dad and they offer it 5 days a week as opposed to all the others which only offer it 3 times a week). It is accessible by both the 2 and 5 trains (the 5 to Pelham Parkway and walk 3 blocks south, or the 2 to Pelham Parkway and walk 5 blocks north). The #12 bus also runs right up Pelham Parkway and stops nearby. Another great thing is this is the ONLY facility with 24 hour visiting hours, which is great.

Jewish Home & Hospital is also one of the better facilities I have seen (both for the staff & how it's maintained, as well as location). But it depends if they have a bed available for him (which they said as of yesterday they do not). I've also heard mostly good things (although there was one or two people who gave me a really bad story, but overall it has gotten positive reviews). One major thing going for the place is accessibility- it is near the B, D and 4 trains as well as a few buses. It's also close to Ariana and near Lehman College where I go to graduate school.

Beth Abraham is very nice as well and definitely has the best reputation. The only thing I didn't like about it was that there is one section of the home where they put 4 people in a room. Dad might not be in that section, but there is a chance he would be depending on his evaluation, so that's the only thing about the place that has me tentative. It is fairly accessible as it is only 2 blocks away from the 2 train on Allerton Ave, as well as right off the Bronx River Parkway (plus there is plenty of parking).

Daughters of Jacob I wasn't overly thrilled with. it didn't look as clean as the other facilities, and it's not in a very good neighborhood and is the most out of the way place for me to get to (although it is accessible by the B & D train and the 4 is not too far but you'd probably need to transfer to the bus). The good things about the place though, were all the patients looked very happy, and the staff seemed very nice and helpful.

The only issues with any of the places were that some expressed concerns about bringing him in under hospice care- mostly due to the fact they are not sure both would be covered by insurance. I have been assured by his CMO case worker it would be, and for a very long basis, but it is just something that keeps coming up.

My hope is that they will put dad either in Morningside, Jewish Home & Hospital or Beth Abraham (but only if he is in the section where he will be in a private or semi-private room), but it depends on bed availability so at this point all we can do is pray that God puts him in the place that will be best for him.

If any of you have any further information, please let me know as it will be greatly appreciated. God Bless!

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UPDATE!

My dad was accepted into Morningside House, and he is being moved probably as we speak (they told me they set up the transport around 4:30pm). So I'm gonna call around 6pm to make sure he is settled in and then I'm gonna go visit.

I'm just so thankful to God that things seem to be going well. There's still stuff to deal with (like having to obtain guardianship over my dad ASAP) but things seem to be working out little by little. So thank you for all your prayers and please keep it up, b/c they are working!

More stress to deal with...

Today has been a very stressful day...

I had gotten a call from a social worker from Montefiore today at around 2pm today. I was busy at work, so I couldn’t take the call, but I was going to the hospital right after work (around 3pm), so I figured I’d find out what the call was all about when I got there.

I got to the hospital at about 3pm, and spent some time with my dad, and around 4:20pm I met with the hospice social worker for Montefiore. He mentioned to me that they were looking to move my dad as soon as possible (b/c he is doing better, so there is basically no reason to have him in the comfort care area anymore). He mentioned that the insurance was looking to move him even as soon as today (Monday), but he said that was too soon, and convinced them to move it another day.

So the guy gave me the names of two rehab/nursing facilities that have hospice care as well as ventillators that are in the network with Montefiore. The problem is one of the places had no room, so basically I only was given one choice- a place called Daughters of Jacob on 167th st and Teller Ave (which isn’t very close to me, but it’s in a central location that’s accessible by the D and 4 trains, as well as a few buses).

Then I asked for places that don’t have vents (since we don’t want him back on a vent anyway) and they gave me names of three more places: Beth Abraham Hospital (which is good, b/c that’s really close to me, but bad, b/c not really close for other people), Jewish Home & Hospital (which is about 2 train stops before Montefiore on Kingsbridge & Jerome), and Morningside House on Pelham Parkway.

The thing is, they are pressuring to have my dad moved ASAP. They want to move him tomorrow (Tuesday) afternoon, but I haven’t even seen the places yet! I need to make sure the place is good before I just sign off on sending him anywhere.

So this puts me on a very limited time schedule. I tried to go to the Daughters of Jacob tonight, but it was late, and they didn’t have anyone to really give me a full tour of the place. So I’m going to have to go back in the morning, so I can get a full view as well as ask questions. I also have to see the other 3 places first thing in the morning. But I figure I’ll need to be at each place for at least 45 minutes to one hour, in order to see everything and ask questions, so they aren’t giving me much time, since they make it sound like they want to move him in the early afternoon (like 1-2pm).

I’m going to try to call patient relations at Montefiore as well as the insurance company to give me at least ONE full extra day in order for me to do research without being so rushed (which even one day isn’t a lot of time, but it’s a lot better than a half day).

Then the other issue is with dad’s doctors. One of them is pretty optimistic, but the others are kind of on the fence about dad’s condition and his chances for improvement. They had a rehab specialist come in and say that dad wasn’t a good candidate for aggressive (or acute) therapy. Which fine, he might not be good for the 4-6 hour therapy, since he’s just coming around, but he deserves more than sub-acute therapy, which I’ve been told is no more than two 15 minute shifts of massaging each day.

So I’m going to need to speak with the doctor again to make convince or make sure that they put in orders for my dad to receive rehabilitation in the discharge planning. Because if that is not put in there, then even if he’s put in a nursing facility that has rehab, he won’t get it b/c it wasn’t ordered.

Those are three pretty big things I have to do very early in the morning tomorrow, and the annoying thing is, they all need to be done at pretty much the same time (which is nearly impossible). And I know plenty of people have offered to help me with stuff for my dad, but sadly, this is stuff technically only my sister and I can do, since we are next of kin (and since my sister is not in NY, it basically falls all on me). However, if anyone can suggest anything that can help me out, it would be greatly appreciated (especially if anyone knows anything about the four facilities I mentioned above).

So yeah, I just wanted to update everyone on the situation, b/c it’s very possible that dad will no longer be in Montefiore by the end of the day (or by end of Wednesday at the latest). I will let everyone know as soon as possible once dad is moved. So please keep my father as well as me in your prayers, b/c we will need it. Thanks again and God Bless!

Some good news about my dad!

It's been a long day, but I just wanted to let everyone know that my dad was taken off the ventillator at 10:20am this morning, but he is doing fine!

He's currently breathing on his own, and doing well. His oxygen reading is at 100 (which is as good as you can get). It started out at 97 and went up to 100 a few minutes later and hasn't gone down since.

He was also pretty responsive afterwards as well. There were about 12 people with him for the procedure, and we prayed for him beforehand letting him know that the decision of whether to live or not would be between him and God, but that there were many people here that needed him. So it looks like dad is fighting and fighting hard.

My dad's current doctor has been my favorite so far, as she is the most optimistic of all the doctors my father has had. She told us that his situation is completely different than it was even less than a week ago. He went from being very depressed with no drive to get better, to really trying his best to be responsive. He also just looks more healthy. He's lost weight but despite that, he looks healthier in the face than he did just days ago.

The doctor says it is all because of the support he has received from all his family, loved ones and friends. Our encouragement is basically breathing new life into him.

God is beginning to work a miracle in my dad's life, and it is partly thanks to everyone who has prayed for him and visited him, and for that I give my thanks to you all.

The doctor now says, that from here on in, it's all up to my dad. His recovery will depend on his will to live and his determination. If he continues to try to respond and make more increases, then she will recomend him to a facility that will begin aggressive rehabilition. It will be a long, hard road, but dad can do it, he just needs our continued support. His doctor believes that if he continues at this pace, it's possible that maybe one day he could walk again. Granted, it's a long shot, and this would be a long time down the line, but if Eddie is motivated it's possible.

So I sent out an e-mail to my dad's friends that our job is to keep Eddie motivated. He needs our continued visits, prayers and support b/c that along with God moving within him is what is giving him the willpower to fight. It's all on Eddie now. He's breathing on his own, he just has to fight to regain his function, but he will get frustrated (as would anyone) so our continued vigilance over him is extremely important.

My dad is still in the clear yet. He's got a long way to go. If he makes no more progress, he will only be put in a nursing facility/hospice center. And we don't want that for him. We want him in that aggressive treatment center that will work hard in trying to get Eddie back into the man he used to be. So that is what to pray for now- that dad will continue to improve and respond more over the next few days.

So please continue to pray for dad, but in the meantime, know that your prayers are beginning to work! Thank you once again so very much!

And the decision has been made..

So I spoke to my dad's doctor in the palliative care unit on Tuesday, and we made the decision to have my dad extubated (taken off the ventillator) on Thursday at 10am.

My sister is flying in tonight (which sucks for her b/c of the weather and her flight has been delayed like crazy so far... she hasn't even left Pittsburgh yet), and Ariana and my grandparents will be there for the procedure. One or two of my dad's cousins is planning on being there as well, and we are also having the pastor of my church come in to pray for my dad beforehand.

So it's a pretty sad time... but we know we are making the best decision. We had been struggling and wondering if we were doing the right thing, but the Lord granted my dad enough strength to make his wishes clear to his doctor (with 2 of his friends as witnesses), as I mentioned in the last post. So at least my sister and I won't be tortured in thinking if we made the right decision. It still sucks, but at least that's some weight off our shoulders.

I'm planning on staying the entire day tomorrow (Thursday) at the hospital, and may stay over for the night as well, depending on how things progress. So to any of my friends who may leave messages to me online, I probably won't see them til Friday. I can take calls (cuz I finally got my minutes back), but I don't wanna kill them right away again, so if anything- if you aren't Verizon, if you can call me after 9pm tomorrow that'd be best.

So just please keep my dad and my family in your prayers as it's going to be an emotionally draining time the next few days. Thanks a lot everyone. My love goes out to you all.

Onto the next stage...

I got a call at 7am this morning (well on Monday morning), that dad was moved to the Palliative/Comfort care area of the hospital.

I went to go see him after work and spent a few hours with him. About 6 of his co-workers came during the time I was there, which was really nice. Ariana came by for a little while as well.

However, before anyone else arrived I had a meeting with his new doctor. She was a very nice woman, who really seemed to empathize with our situation.

She began by explaining that she spent a good amount of time with my dad in the morning when he was transferred. And at one point, two of his co-workers who he is also very good friends with came by to visit. So the doctor and the 2 co-workers spoke with my dad for awhile. This was before they put him on the morphine and apparently my dad was being quite responsive. The doctor decided to try some basic tests on him, to see exactly how responsive he was and it worked out well. They were talking to him and he was responding with blinks and by squeezing their hands.

So the doctor decided to talk to my dad about his situation and with his co-workers as witnesses she asked my dad to respond with blinks and asked him if he would want to be “let go” or continue in his current condition and he responded with a no (well in terms of blinks) that he doesn’t want to be in his condition anymore.

The doctor continued to tell me, that she believes that he is making a little progress since the neuro tests that were performed just over a week ago, so she called the neurologists back in for a consultation. But in the end, they agreed that he still probably would not regain cerebral function. The female doctor said that POSSIBLY with very aggressive rehab, dad might be able to be more responsive. What that entails is hard to say though. She said if he had the “drive’ she would suggest it, but that after meeting with him and observing him, she feels he has no drive to want to try and get better. She said that he also seems depressed.

I explained that I could figure why, b/c he was alone in Hartford for so long, I can only imagine him feeling depressed. So hearing that was a bit heart-wrenching. However, at least hearing from my doctor about the conversation she had with dad confirms that we are making the right decision about what to do with him- no matter how painful it may be.

And as I stated, the rest of the visit went well. He had a lot of visitors, and even though he was doped up on morphine for most of the time, he was fairly responsive with me as well. As everytime I asked him to squeeze my hand, he would actually do it, so that was a good feeling.

I also brought him my radio and left it on the spanish station, so he could listen to his salsa, merengue and reggaeton (which I know he loves). So hopefully that will put him in better spirits.

Now we just have to deal with the final step- ‘extubating’ dad (basically taking him off the ventillator). The doctor said she will be at the hospital til noon tomorrow, so I could do it before then. I could also do it afterwards if I wanted, but it would have to be done by another doctor. So she offered that I could wait til Wednesday til she returned so she could be the doctor around for anything that happened.

So I’m figuring to wait til Wednesday. However, I'm gonna see if I can do it at night b/c we have the meeting with the co-op board on Wed at 6:30pm and we can't really postpone it cuz that would throw everything off. So I’m hoping they’ll let me do it around 8pm or so on Wed night. I’ll have to say a prayer about that one. But hopefully they’ll accommodate me, as the doctor did say she felt it was important for me and family to be with dad when he is taken off the machine.

And then I’ll probably spend the night at the hospital on Wednesday night til Thursday, take Thursday and Friday off work and hang around the hospital to wait to see what happens.

So yeah, wish us luck with the co-op board meeting and say a prayer for me and the family, as I know these next few days are going to be rough. Especially b/c the doctor is guessing that my dad probably won’t pass away immediately. She says he has the ability to stick around for a bit, so this may be a prolonged thing. In a way I hope he lasts til after Saturday b/c that’s Ariana’s graduation and I really want her to be able to enjoy it, b/c she worked so hard for it. Our own undergrad ceremony was ruined by terrible weather, so I am hoping this one will make up for it and not have a air of sadness attached to it. But we shall see... God has a plan for everything, even if we can’t make any sense of it as things are happening.

Rollercoaster of Emotion on the weekend

I took Grandma and Lelo to go see dad in the hospital today. It was pretty intense. Grandma immediately prayed for dad. She laid her hands on him, and prayed, cried, and spoke in tongues.

After she was done praying, both her and Lelo were like “Oh my God, John! Look at his face!” And I noticed a tear coming out of his eye. He must have understood all that my grandma said as she prayed for him and it touched him enough to make him cry. Seeing that was both encouraging yet heart-wrenching at the same time.

Shortly after, he started to try to move his hand as well. He had been slightly squeezing my hand with his thumb, but he tried with some of his fingers too. And at one point when we stepped away from him to look at and read some of the cards and notes people left for him on the wall, we noticed him trying to LIFT his hand. He didn’t get far, but we saw him attempting, which was absolutely the most movement I’ve ever seen him attempt.

So we spoke to his nurse and he said that yes, dad has been moving a little bit. However, while it’s not exactly a “reflex” it may not necessarily mean he’s trying to do anything, b/c he does not respond to commands. If you tell him to blink or to squeeze your hand, he won’t. He just does it randomly.

So it feels like being on an emotional rollercoaster. Seeing something that makes me hopeful, only to hear that it’s most likely nothing. It’s pretty painful to go through.

But as we left the hospital, I filled in my grandparents on all the doctors said to me, and while they said they’d continue to pray for my dad, that they agree with my decision about Palliative care. So at least I know I have full support from ALL of the family, as well as the majority of his friends, which helps me a lot.

But obviously it’s still a crappy situation to have to go through. This weekend has truly been a rollercoaster. I was able to get to such a high note on Saturday, with the good news about the wedding photographer and DJ, and then the fun night at Patty’s birthday party, just to get brought right back down to earth with the emotional heaviness of dad’s situation. But that is life...

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After going to the hospital I went to Ariana’s place to spend some time with her and at about five minutes to 8pm, we decided to order the TNA PPV. It wound up being freakin awesome. The frst match was Chris Sabin vs Sonjay Dutt vs “Black Machismo” Jay Lethal and it was definitely a match of the year candidate. Every match was at LEAST decent, while many of them were very solid or better. The Texas Death Match between James Storm and Chris Harris was also pretty insane (lots of brutality and LOTS of blood). I’m very glad we decided to order the show b/c it helped me get my mind off of things.

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Line of the night from the PPV was when one of the announcers was talking about the condition of a wrestler who was jumped backstage and “sent to the hospital.” He described the wrestler’s condition as having received a “super severe concussion.” That cracked me up to no end.

Another night of Birthday fun!

I should be sleeping right now, but I just had to put up a post about the day I had before I head to bed.

Well first off, some very good news. Ariana and I were able to book both a photographer and a DJ for the wedding today. We went through a company called Prestige Weddings, which was referred to us by our friend Antoinette, who is also using them for her wedding. We got a really good deal, so we're excited about that. We are also quite relieved b/c those were two things we really wanted to get done this month, and now that that is out of the way, we have a little bit of breathing room in terms of the wedding planning.

Then later tonight we went to Patty's birthday dinner party at Coromandels (which is an Indian restuaruant in New Rochelle). I had never had Indian food before, so this was me being quite experimental. I actually enjoyed it though! Granted, I got something on the safer side (a type of BBQ chicken), but it was decent. My favorite part was one of the breads we tried though. It was really good.

Following the dinner, we all went back to Joe & Patty's place to play "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" During the dinner, Joe had each of us fill out a sort of "survey" and he used those in order to come up with topics for us to use in the game. Pretty much everyone went over for the game, so we had almost 20 people in total.

And while none of us are anywhere quite as talented as the people on the actual show, we all had an amusing time. Both Henry and Pete took some videos during the night, so I'm sure those will be on youtube shortly (and I'll link to them on my blog later as well).

As the night went on, we lost about half the crew, til there were only 10 of us left= me, Ariana, Joe, Marisa, Phil, Ketrin, Jordan, Maryann, Joe & Patty. At that point we decided to play Taboo.

And wow, if we thought Whose Line was amusing, things were JUST getting started. We split into two teams (5 people on each time). My team was: Joe, Marisa, Patty & Jordan against Joe's team of Phil, Ketrin, Maryann & Ariana. We unofficially declared Joe's team as "Team Drunkie" b/c Ketrin was absolutely hammered by this point, and even though she was the only member totally drunk, she was so gone, it covered for the rest of the team, heh (although surprisingly, she wound up being one of the best members on their team, as she got them the most points everytime she was the clue giver).

There were a few hysterical moments during the game, but the two funniest (to me at least) were when Phil was the clue giver and at one point he was kind of stuck on a card, so he enthusiastically, gives the clue of "V" (nothing else, just "V," giving a handsign for it and all). At that point Joe Vozz (who was the one with the buzzer checking that Phil didn't give any of the clues on the card), starts busting out laughing. He was laughing so hard he nearly fell out of his chair. Phil's time soon ran out and no one guessed the word, so we immediately asked Joe to tell us what the word was. He was still laughing so hysterically that he couldn't even tell us, so he showed us the card and the word was:

"Mini-Series"

-And dammit... that got the half of the room, who actually "got it" to practically fall out of our chairs along with Joe. I know me and Jordan especially got a kick out of it, b/c we actually remembered the show.

(and for those who still don't get the joke- "V" was a TV mini-series that aired in 1984, about a group of aliens that invaded earth that looked like humans, but were actually like reptiles underneath the human skin. It was quite a creepy show, and I remembered being pretty freaked out by it as a small child. It was just so absolutely random that Phil picked that fairly obscure show as his example and expected people to guess the answer... freakin hysterical).

And the next hilarious part was on Ketrin's final turn as the clue-giver (and Patty was the one with the buzzer) when she got a card and went "it goes 'woof woof'" and people started to guess kinds of dogs until Phil quickly guessed "POODLE!" and she was like "yes! you're right!" and started to go to the next card but then Patty was just kind of like "umm... the card says "puddle." Which just got all of us to crack up (b/c as I stated earlier, Ketrin was pretty wasted at this point).

My team wound up winning the game by a score of 57 to 49. And then we just laid back and were chilling while Joe and Marisa were tossing back and forth a few small "stress-toy" cows that Joe had brought out earlier as props for "Whose Line."

Well soon, the tossing of the cows somehow morphed into a full scale war of everyone throwing the cows at each other (b/c mind you there were about 20 or so of these cows and shortly after the battle began, the cows began to become mutilated and lose body parts, which we also used as ammo). The room split into a full warzone. The two Joe's were on one side, Phil & Ketrin were in the middle, and everyone else was on the other side. And we were seriously pelting these things at one another. We put up barricades, were crawling around like we were in the trenches, and the two Joe's even took Maryann as a prisoner at one point.

This battle waged on for a good 25-30 minutes too. It was like we regressed to being twelve years old again. It was great. Joe said he could probably get his hands on another bag of cows so we're hoping to possibly recreate this scene at Jubilee. But we'll see. It was just spontaneous and fun, so I don't know if it'd be the same, but oh man, was it crazy.

So yeah, today was a very good day overall, with a really fun night. It has definitely been a great year for birthday parties so far!

Another update on my dad (not good news)

I had a meeting today with my dad’s doctors at Montefiore hospital. Jordan put me in contact with a family friend of his that works at Montefiore last week and after speaking with him, he referred me to an EEG specialist that would check out my dad. So I requested a second opinion on his condition last week.

Well I was called today and told that the tests were done on Friday afternoon and the results were in and looked over this morning. So when I went to the hospital today after work, we discussed the new results.

Sadly, I was basically told the same thing the people in Hartford had told us. The EEG specialist called my dad’s condition “diffuse cerebral disfunction.” Which basically means that- the cerebrum is the part of the brain that basically makes us who we are. It controls thoughts, speech, etc. And it turns out that that is the part of the brain which has been effected the most by the strokes that my dad had. The other part of his brain that controls the more involuntary functions is basically alright. So that is why we are seeing him opening his eyes and looking around a bit. It doesn’t necessarily mean he is trying to wake up or look at us, it’s just his eyes looking around and reacting to objects, sort of like a reflex.

The words the specialist used were: “chances are grave that he regain cerebral function.”

This was the third EEG done on my dad. He had two up in Hartford (right after the initial strokes, and then another about 3 weeks later), and now the one down here. There has been basically no improvement, and there doesn’t look to be any. As was stated before the “best case scenario” is that he MIGHT be able to eventually be able to respond to people maybe through blinks of his eyes or taps of his fingers and stuff, but he basically wouldn’t be the same person he once was.

It’s just hard to hear... especially considering my dad is such a lively person. He just LOVES to tell jokes, and be the center of attention. So to see him just lying there in the state he’s in, and knowing he most likely won’t be the same again is heart-wrenching. And we were hoping against all odds that maybe a second opinion here in NY would tell us something different than what we heard up in Hartford but it hasn’t, and the time is quickly approaching where we are going to have to make a choice.

Right now, my dad has a small fever. So he can’t be discharged b/c they have to treat it. But as soon as he is healthy again, he will be stable and the hospital will basically have no reason to keep him there and they will need to immediately seek out moving him to a nursing or rehab facility.

So our choice is to either have them aggressively fight the fever (put in a central line, do CAT scans to find out what’s wrong, etc), and then when he is better to put him in a nursing home with ventilators OR to go the Palliative care route, and have him moved to the comfort care zone of the hospital, where he will be taken off the ventilator and be put on morphine (or other drugs) to make him as comfortable as possible and just let nature take its course. (Although let me clear one thing up. We CAN have the doctors continue to treat the fever with just antibiotics and THEN take him off the ventilator, it just doesn’t make sense to go the aggressive route if that’s the case. So the doctor is trying to be cool with me and giving us that option which could give us more time but still, we wouldn’t expect my dad to have a fever for too long, so decision time is rapidly approaching no matter which way we look at it).

Obviously, neither of these are great choices. We REALLY do not want to put my dad in a nursing facility. We’ve heard horror stories about those places about people being neglected, and even abused. We don’t want to put my dad through that. Plus, who knows how long the insurance would cover it for?

Thing is, the other choice obviously sucks a whole lot more. If we take him off the ventilator then we are basically just beginning the countdown to his passing. It could be as quick as a few hours, or stretch on as long as a couple of weeks (possibly more). And that is going to be something very rough to go through.

I know what my dad would want in the long run. He has said in the past that he wouldn’t want to live in a vegetative state. We never seriously discussed it or put it down legally, but he has stated it jokingly before. Thing is, even though he was joking, we know that he was serious beneath it all. He would NOT want to live his life in his current state. The main thing in the back of my mind is, I know what he wants, but have we given him enough time to have even the slightest chance at a miracle?

I mean, I’m not kidding myself, I know it’ll take nothing short of a miracle for my dad to get better, but I’m a Christian and I have great faith. But the thing is, how much time do I give him? Initially when I was told everything back in Hartford my thought was “maybe about three months...” And at this point we are at about 6 weeks. Which is short of my original plan, but then again, if he hasn’t changed at all in 6 weeks, what would another 6 weeks really do? Especially with the prognosis that was given to me by TWO sets of doctors after three exams.

So it’s like, I know what I should do, but I can’t help but have these questions in the back of my head. It just really sucks... I was hoping I wouldn’t have to make this decision. I wouldn’t wish this kind of “responsibility” on anyone.

I thought I had been handling the whole situation pretty well this past month. I mean, I was like a zombie that first week, but afterwards, since my dad was up in Hartford I was able to try to regain a semblence of my life by going out and having fun and trying to keep everything in the back of my mind. But after this week, and especially after tonight, I’m just right back to that “zombie” mode. I’m just so emotionally spent, and then my mind just starts to wander and think about things like- feeling sad that my dad won’t be around for my wedding, or for the eventual grandchildren, and also wishing that I had spent more time with him in the past few years. I know I shouldn’t beat myself up over that kind of stuff, and I’m trying not to, but sometimes it’s just hard to NOT think about things like that.

So yeah, that’s where things stand with me right now. I just had to type all this out, b/c I wanted everyone to know the situation, as well as just put my emotions down on “paper.” Plus, I don’t think I could handle explaining this over and over again to people.

Once again, I just ask that you all please keep my dad, me and my family in your prayers. We’ll probably have to make our decision anytime as early as tomorrow to about a week from now, so I know I’ll really need the strength and support of all my family and friends. Thank you once again and God Bless!

The Sakura Matsuri Festival

This past Sunday some of the crew went to the Brooklyn Botanical Garden for the annual Sakura Matsuri (Cherry Blossom) Festival.

We went with Joe, Patty, Kristen, Jordan, Maryann, Jeff & Susana and we had a really good time. There was a ton of stuff to see and do there. It was nice to do something outdoors for once (since we had been wanting to, but couldn't really think of anything good).

We walked around through most of the gardens, took a bunch of pics and watched some of the different performances at the main tent (including some Tanko Drumming, traditional Japanese music, a Geisha dance, and a martial arts exhibition).

You can check out some of the pics I took from the day here at picasa:

BBG- Sakura Matsuri 2007

****

After the Festival, we went to a "Not Ray's" Pizza nearby, and then we went down the block to get a Red Velvet Cake from the Harlem Cake Man. It was a pretty pricy cake, but I actually wound up liking it! (Although that was probably b/c it technically wasn't made well... it's supposed to be like a mix of vanilla & chocolate cake that is dyed red with creamcheese frosting, but it tasted more just like a vanilla cake, and the frosting didn't taste like creamcheese to me, so I was happy, heh).

Then later that night, me & Ariana went to Phil's to see the WWE Backlash PPV, which was pretty decent (especially the main event). And that was our Sunday!

Finally some good news to share

After a long month of craziness, I finally got a bit of good news about my dad today.

He was finally moved from Hartford Hospital down to Montefiore Hospital in the Bronx! So now we can visit him on a regular basis, as well as start the process of obtaining guardianship over him.

His condition is still the same, but I saw him tonight, and at least it was a lot easier to see him without all the tubes down his nose and throat. He also opens his eyes a bit and will yawn and move his mouth a tiny bit. The neurologist in Hartford said that probably doesn't mean anything and there is no change in his condition, but to me, it's something he wasn't doing a month ago, so I gotta take that as some sort of good sign.

So please continue to keep my dad in your prayers. You never know how God can move in a person's life.